Unnoticed Series of Events

The busy mind has the tendency to ride along the events of life unnoticed. The mind ignores the most obvious privileges given by the nature and processes of biological fusions of human development.

The mere motion of breathing, swallowing and all movement goes unnoticed until it has been taken away. Taken away is an idea, a conception the human mind wants to brush aside to the corner of its eyes. It doesn’t want to know about it. It is a given we have the freedom to breath, to move and to be granted the notions that makes us normal; it gives us a normal life. Normal is quite broad. Broad are the definitions that no longer mean what they had been created for. The concept of creation is interpreted in the same respect that life has been created to live within an unnoticed series of events. These events are beyond our control and control is something we are never really capable of ever controlling.

Makes sense? You can’t control.

The world is our bubble that we get to experience an endless TV show that might or might not receive such high ratings. We explore so many avenues to find and attract so many people to watch in hope they will always tune in at prime time for the 30 or so minutes we have for attention.

Huh? Sorry, I already changed the channel.

Our minds lurk in places not for the noticed. You take away one or more of those essentials and all of a sudden something has disturbed your ride in life.

What is this strange feeling I am feeling right now? Is it that time again that I noticed I have a privilege that has been taken away from me that I didn’t notice before? It is not a familiar feeling for the busy mind who encounters a series of fortune that only fate and destiny are to blame for. Blame comes when the minds that never experience such luck curse the day when those other minds win the lottery.

“Curse them! Why couldn’t it be ME?! I despise your good fortune! I NEEED that MONEY moreee!”

Now we have an unnoticed series of fortune, events and emotion, relationships and never ending amnesia of the unnoticed knocking on your mind. The feeling of losing privileges of life and the cliché of not knowing what you had until it is gone establishes tinnitus inside your ears. “Life is unfair”, rings the sounds of words inside your head.

What happened? You have lost your movement? You’re having trouble breathing? Are you finding it hard to swallow? Are you in hospital now? I can’t believe it.

“Gone, just like that. I was fine yesterday. I was perfectly healthy and fine. What the hell is this? Bullshit! This is …”

You’re experiencing an epiphany? You have gone through your life riding along the events and fortunes given to you by fate and destiny.

“Fate and destiny, you’re tripping on something mate, no such things, these are made up fantasies mate!”

If you had a creator or believed in one you will start to disbelieve and curse the day you were born and abuse some God above.

“Why do I deserve this? Why?”

Why are you repeating the words that are trying to find you a means of comfort? Why are you starting to realise the feeling is not so familiar now?

It had to take a series of unnoticed events to show you what is behind the veil of life. You feel so overwhelmed and you need to tell everyone about your story.

You yell out, “Everyone, you have NOO idea what you are taking for granted!! NO IDEA!! Stop, look around you. Feel how you breathe so freely and not knowing what it feels like not to breathe. Think about losing it, think about … death.”

You have this unbelievable desire to let everyone know. Post it everywhere, “You don’t know what you’re taking for granted.”

You remember back in the hospital, no one came to visit, you didn’t get a single message of concern and you experience another epiphany. Your mind is rushing and thinking about who is close to you, trying to fill in the blank canvases of those who have not asked about you so far. This feeling is not familiar to you any longer, it’s normal. Friends are not as close as they seem anymore and some don’t even know you’re in hospital, you go unnoticed.

The cliché is clichéd and yet, only through these times of unfortunate consequences, your mind feels like it has an obligation to tell the other minds of the world who are riding life’s unnoticed series of events of what they are taking for granted. That, and you notice you might not have many true friends that have been exposed in your baptism of fire.

The River Scene in Reverse: Tainted (Part 1) and Serene (Part 2)


Tainted River (Part 1)

The river used to sparkle across the lands and the sunshine was able to mend its rays through the water causing many marine life to leap for joy with a noticeable smile across there opening. I used to call this river side home, but now it looks like a burial ground.

While I walk along the dry fainted brown grass, I notice the large natural stream of water chokes to flow as its reflection is tainted with transparent, green, deadly, bloodsucking parasites.

The thick, burnt scent of toxic oil drums tickles the tip of my nose just seconds before I cough in disgust.

A seagull fell from the heavens, I tilt my head towards the darkened sky and I observed the hazy discoloured thin mist of fog that seems to have poisoned the air. The accumulation of gas that seems to fill the river shows no mercy as it sucks the life out like a vacuum from living organisms which used to consume the river ends.

Everywhere I turn, all I see is contamination. Fish that once had the colour of the clear sky in the daytime now have rotted from within. Chairs that had been beautifully painted like a piece done by Michel Angelo looks much like it had been lit in flames. I can see the river’s empty soul like looking through a window; I can hear a faint echo of desperation and struggle which sounded more like demons screams through the depths of hell. It’s as if the river is drying up, the water drowning and the sense of existence is fading away.

I walk along the river’s path, my feet sinking into the glutinous mud; I approach an old rusty shed, like an old man, that’s about to die and crumble. I walk across the wretched place to find a creature. It has no eyes and it doesn’t breath. It has massive jaws and armoured shell. It makes sounds, but would not speak. Surely this must be madness. I close my eyes and my world falls into darkness. I release my eyes from their slumber and the creature is gone. I hastily rush back outside to only see the same creature dead, to think something so evil, killed by an environment so sinister.

As I continue to wonder, a dark spider like animal arises from the deep ends of a hollow wood stump. Eyes are blazing vividly like the colour of crimson that runs vigorously in our body. This spider seems shy; it feels as if the river reflects its own heart of wickedness. The spider vanishes into the mist, like a magician covered in smoke.

Piles of worthless discarded material and infestations swallow the river as if it was a welcoming ground for a rubbish tip. Animal lives become trapped as they struggle to discharge themselves from all sorts of plastic and inferior aluminium cans. Much of the sea life suffocate and crave the thirst for air as other beasts wander and many die.

I have seen many disturbing images in this river today as I continue to hear the screams that plague the waters. I move along to where the Sun used to shine. Whenever I felt cold, I would stand in front of the Sun and reach out to it’s warmth like a mother’s touch when you’re alone and scared.

The river no longer smiles, but its echo will still linger, as will its soul.


River Serene (Part 2)

There is one place, not too far from my heart, where I feel completely at home with nature, it’s like the river reflects the sunlight as if diamonds were reflecting hope to my world. This charming spot lies at the river sight. The water stream is crystal clear, and it reflects the colour of the vibrant blue sky.

The river is cold in any season and makes me shiver only by looking at it. However, that coldness makes the place even more special. The calm body of water makes almost no sound, like a sea of stars in space where no one can hear them burn.

When the light breeze comes, I can open my mouth and taste the purity of life. It emits from the air that causes the gentle lapping waves, which form across the river side. Animals run freely across the burning essence of the green, soft grass where an old, oak tree lies. The tree drinks the cleansing water like a child that is breast fed by her mother, for never ending life of nourishment.

If I sit on the rocky banks of the river, I can catch a glimpse of schools of fish, soundlessly passing by. Many kinds of fish make this water full of life, especially trout, with their acrobatic jumps above the tranquil surface. I lean over and touch the silky clear water, the water is poise and energising, ripples erupt around my finger as the mesmerising flow of small rings speed away from my hand like a nuclear blast as if I was the enemy.

In the deepest parts of the serene river, a heron proudly waltzes around the edges of the water in silence. Its swift and perfect movements sent sedating melodies throughout my consciousness and felt pulsating shivers down my spine. The fresh dynamic air glides right under my nose with every flap of its wings and the scent of the heron revitalises my heart and soul.

I made my way along the river side and from far ahead, found a vision of beauty, a dazzlingly gorgeous young lady. The Sun aroused by this rare sight increased its intensity hoping the young lady would shed parts of her clothing. The road ahead seemed long for her, she was alone and tired. No matter how hard the Sun tried to burn, she didn’t seem to mind. A rare innocence gifted from such rare beauty. Perspiration made its way to her lips and her mouth opened, it made the Sun’s heartbeat, as if the hearts make the river flow.

The water is calm as The Moon decides to admire its appearance from the reflection. The water blushes as the angels send auroras throughout the evening sky. Numerous amounts of colours charge around The Moon gently kissing its cheeks.

A flock of geese made its way to catch some food, and ducks quack and chat while oiling their feathers in the river. Together with the orchestra of birds, the soaring eagles, the greenery and the majestic mountain peak, this river is surely a masterpiece of the creator.




Update 20/02/2012: Part 2 has been re-written in parts due to errors from the original work.

New Year’s Eve On Oblivion (New Year Special: 2012)

What is the world up to when the clock pushes its breath beyond the redemption, it pushes its hopes over oblivion?

Different traditions, different parts of the world and different customs; the past will remember them, the present will enjoy them and the future will remember how good the present was back in the past; how we all become part of history, today.

In Australia, New Year’s Eve fills many lives with an unquestionable anticipation of hidden hopes not realised as yet. The soul’s camp on the beaches at night looking upon the abyss, the water is an endless sea of black memories washing ashore.

The loud noises, the frantic silence escaping the celebration, as it hits midnight the silence dies, the car horns are heard for a while and the sky’s darkness is shot with the light of fire; this time the fire is made of impassioned rainbows. This is the only time, calm, gentle rainbows become slightly excited.

Austria is blossoming with romance and evil spirits waiting for a moment to escape, but the sound of trumpets seal the demons for another year.

Belgium hides the youngest poets who paint a letter out of words and give them to their parents; the fireworks of a parent’s heart.

In London, swarms of people make their way to Trafalgar Square to hear the chimes of London’s Big Ben as it announces the arrival of the New Year.

The French enjoy a feast at home where presents are exchanged, while others roam the streets holding a rose looking for innocent love that have nowhere to go.

Germany tries to predict the future of good will and the children in Greece still leave their shoes out for gifts.

In Hungary, images are burned to mark the death of misfortunes and horror of the past year and to hopefully start a New Year with some sanity and composure.

India comes out of the darkness and lights the way for a New Year, while the Japanese laugh off the New Year for some good luck. After all, laughing is the best medicine to start something anew.

Netherlands decide to burn Christmas Trees in street bonfires and let fireworks bring in the New Year; the bonfires provide much needed warmth for those without shelter.

The Polish fear a dragon might be coming, while in Russia, Grandfather Frost brings the children New Year toys.

The people of Scotland go into a cleaning frenzy to start the year on a clean note, while in South Africa; gunshots are fired into the darkness while the smoke gently floats away.

South America has bonfires outside their homes, Spain’s world stops turning where grapes and wine is consumed.

The United States is also filled with romance with dance parties for the lonely and in Wales the children sing for Portugal, while Spain’s grape eating fascination catches on.

With most eyes fixated on the sheet of stars, every human being is hoping, some, modest and fearful. Others are repeating their desire for a good New Year over and over in their minds as they’re left reflecting on the not so good year about to pass.

The day starts with great anticipation and a hidden stream of unlocking potential motivation, during the course of the day, as it bleeds into the night, we are tested beyond any sort of redemption and our hopes and dreams lay somewhere on the edge of oblivion.

An Unread Letter

To my lost love,
 
I write you this letter knowing that you will never read it, but I feel that it’s something that I have to do. I know it’s over between us and that there is nothing left. I hate each day because I will never relive what we once shared.
 
I cycle through the memories of us and try to believe that everything is the same. Although deep down inside, I know that the memories will fade away and will one day become so grey and colourless as if they never existed.
 
Do you remember when we used to lay down together and you used to stare me in the eyes? You would tell me, “For the first time in my life, I am happy”, and I would look at you and smile. I never appreciated those words until you were gone. I never acknowledged what that meant to you. For one moment in time, when I held you in my arms, you were at peace and didn’t want to be anywhere else. I took that for granted.
 
I dwell on the time when you once said, “You mean a lot to me and I miss you so much. You make everything pleasurable and nice … and sparkly, glittery, shimmery and sickeningly colourful like a Disney movie. I hope that one day I can make you as happy as you have made me.”
 
Your face used to glow at the first thought of me. Even when I was not around, just knowing that you were going to see me made the day worthwhile and gave you something to look forward to. When I would finally arrive at your doorstep, your smile would say it all and your eyes would light up. How I miss that so much. Yet the last memory I have of you is one deflated and cold, as if I never meant anything to you. You couldn’t even look at me as I walked away.
 
I never gave you the commitment that you deserved. In protecting myself I kept you at a distance and pushed you too far away. These words still linger in my mind, “Once upon a time you used to like hearing from me. You used to like my long messages and my mundane talkative crap. Then something changed. You no longer enjoyed my ramblings. You lived happily ever after and I pondered why you never showed me how much you really loved me.”
 
I’m sorry that I didn’t do enough, but I want you to know that each day hurts without you. I feel you fading away from my mind, but not from my heart. My heart won’t let you go and it holds on to you in hope that you will come back to me and we can start again. But you are gone, you are truly gone. Those feelings that you once had, those words that you once spoke, will no longer be felt or said to me by you. And it’s sad, so damn sad, because I still love you and wish that my bleeding heart will be healed by your hands.
 
An emptiness now resides, that no matter what I do, I cannot seem to fill. It’s a constant void that reminds me of the experiences that I will never share with you again, the happy memories that we will never make. I know it’s goodbye, but I don’t want to accept it, because if I do then I know that I have truly lost you. For now, it’s just easier to pretend that I still have you and that I am still everything to you … even though it’s pretend.
 

Always yours,

xox
 

P.S. – Remember how you used to dream of building that house together and wishing that you could come home to me every night? I wish for that too …



Written by Charles Daaboul

A Letter To My Son

As a child I took many situations as they came. I picked up a lot of life’s messages and lessons.

As I grew up between the ages of thirteen to seventeen, I realised in my teenage years that I went though a lot of negative dilemmas and quite a few of positives as well. I learnt lots of things in my years as a teenager and I went through obstacles that were in my way. These obstacles were a challenge but I managed to overcome them. You go through insecurities and stages where you get depressed quite a lot.

When you reach the ages of eighteen to twenty-eight, you might realise that the good things in life are coming to you. These are the stages in life where you sit down and think about where the next step in life is. Think about finishing university, getting a new house, getting married and maybe having children and buying a car. There are many things to work out and that’s when your life really starts.

Once you have settled down around the age of thirty-eight and beyond you start to look back on the things in life that you remembered, the things that you have done that were so great. You tend to look back at your accomplishments and pride yourself on them.

If things don’t go so well, don’t have a sad grim on your face forever. Remember, there will be times that will upset you and you have to try to work yourself around it. Always try to seek help if you can’t solve the problem yourself. 

If you want to become a man and make use of your time on Earth, then be wise! Learn from your mistakes and find your weaknesses and strengthen them.

Don’t have the macho look; be yourself. The only thing in life that will make you succeed in everything you do is your mind. Use it for it is the only thing that will guide you every step of the way! The big macho man was left in the past. In today’s society knowledge is power.

If you’re having trouble at school for any reason, bullies or homework, make sure you talk to your teachers or people that you feel comfortable with. They will help you.

Don’t be influenced by your peers too much. I know it’s hard and sometimes popularity is at stake, but you got to take control. If you think about it, proving that you’re worthy of something to your friends doesn’t count in the long run. They won’t remember it; they will forget it, they might never be there again and you will suffer from the effects. So be smart and know what you have to do. Don’t do what you don’t want to do because of what others tell you. Listen to the right people. Watch out for the minority of people that try to put you down and make you sink. After all, there is nothing more they would like than to see you fail and become miserable.

If you notice something about your health, find out what it is, be curious about these things, read about it and if it is nothing serious, don’t worry about it. But if it needs attention son, don’t be a chicken to go to the doctor.

If you are having relationship issues, with a girl you like, don’t be afraid to go up to her and tell her how you feel. If you don’t, she will eventually be taken. I have the same taste as you, and I know how quick these girls get boyfriends.

Don’t hesitate. Have the courage and bravery to stand up for what you believe in. Don’t be pushed by other people and have the guts to say ‘no’ sometimes.

If you’re a ‘yes’ man then people will just take advantage of you. Don’t let that happen and don’t make yourself feel used.

Listen to people when they are giving you advice. These are hidden pearls that you can add to your growing knowledge of wisdom.

Be sure to have a sense of humour and take certain things as a joke and don’t take offence to them. There is nothing more ordinary and embarrassing than making a scene because you couldn’t recognise a joke that was being made. However with that being said, if you feel that it’s more than a joke and it is really pissing you off then have the courage to say, “Wait a second, you’re going a bit too far here!” Don’t be afraid of anyone because that shows you’re weak, and you’re not. It’s okay to be afraid, but not when you’re living in fear.

Learn to have fun at the right times and know when to be serious and give it your max. You can have your little shenanigans and mischievous moments but know when to stop son.

Life is about having fun and being happy, it’s all about the experiences you have and make sure you pick up the messages in life that’s been shown to you. Don’t miss them because your ignorance can affect you pretty bad so get into the know. Learn to help people. If someone is seeking your help give them the helpful hand and show them the door, but let them open it.

Son, I want you to remember three things, ‘intelligence’, ‘wisdom’ & ‘honour’. With these three things, you my son can be a man that will be respected, trusted and remembered. Now be good, and good luck!


Love your Dad.

The Destroyer

Looking far across the sea with a single thought that has been paralysed by deep pondering, thinking at no pace, irregular, but frequent, about what our destiny could be.

We seem to like the idea of having some importance about existing, some purpose important enough, but don’t know anything but feel as if it’s important. That’s all we are good for, thinking that we are important.

Off into that distance, life ends up looking a little pale. Not as bright as it could be and the wonder, we like to wonder all the time about how our life should be.

With our thinking, we destroy everything. We burn any life left in us by thinking. It’s madness. Deep depression, and slowly the darkness solaces you and you think again, always thinking, always destroying, and destroying yourself.

We want to run into a forest we have never been to, but to run into this forest, we need to know where it is for us to run through it. We can’t do that. We start to think about this forest and what we intend to do and we don’t want to do it anymore because we destroyed it. We thought too much and killed the idea. We don’t want to run in the forest anymore. It’s done, we destroyed it. The idea is gone, not interested.

Then dawn sets and we have no direction anymore. Liberated ourselves, satisfied another day is gone and we have destroyed any idea we had, everything destroyed. With that idea and single thought now paralysed because in that state of wonder we liked the idea of almost catching the purpose of why we exist, even running the risk of looking like a stunned corpse. The sea almost looks empty enough, like your thoughts, and you can see your eye lids frown and drop down and think about that you’re existing because everything else in the universe forgot to think.

If the universe did decide to think about what it was doing, it will destroy itself and collapse. Every planet will explode and implode together, orchestrated beautifully, big bang after another because everything decided to think for itself and destroy itself. Then, no life left to destroy itself, no life left to start destroying beautiful ideas and thoughts because of judgements made by thinking which destroyed beauty.

Beauty never had to be thought, it was just there, always looking beautiful, but thinking it was beautiful made it ugly enough to be dreadful looking to the eyes, disgusting enough because of that single thought of doubting its beauty we destroyed it. Along with every other notion of purpose and with no purpose comes no notion of anything important.

And then we are all back at the cliff looking out towards the sea, remembering we have no purpose and now knowing we also have no notion of anything that made us not important. Looking like a stunned corpse and suddenly music plays in the background as if you’re the star of your own movie and you become scared to think too much about your current situation because you realise it’s now very beautiful and you don’t want to destroy it anymore.