the smile of dreams

When the person you love dies, in your dreams, all you remember is their smile.

You once again feel like you belong right after you have moved on four years ago. You might have let go, but your mind still holds on. You try so hard to stop the many thoughts that flood during the time of sleep where it’s your only time to rest in an eight hour day of full time work, seven days a week.

You work on the weekends just to make ends meet that are so tightly trying to escape you from living comfortably. Your mind will not sleep because it is time for thoughts.

You suffer from insomnia and the doctor and your psychologist couldn’t understand why, you have perfect health. Your mind never had the time during the day to talk to you about how it feels and what it desires. It gets lonely and tries in the only way it knows how to, through dreams.

You have trouble sleeping; your thoughts become your dreams. Your mind starts to dream, that smile you lost that has made you belong for years. You watch along, as your mind takes you through a journey you have lived before. You never knew how amazing it was until life allowed it to slip through your fingers.

Overwhelmed with emotion that transforms your body into a cave of defined meanings for feelings, you watch endlessly focusing on the details, the detail of that smile. They had always smiled this way, the same way you were too busy to notice how you made them feel, until they had no more time left. You had been reminded in dreams that you dream through thoughts, the smile your mind had been searching for.

You don’t work weekends anymore because you take that time to dream of the smile you once had, the smile that made you feel like you belonged for all those years.

The smile that took you a lifetime to find, the smile that you fear will never find again and the only smile to be reminded of, in your dreams.