Life As A Writer

Michael Daaboul. 26 y/o from Australia/Melbourne. Digital Designer & Creative Writer.

I wake up thinking this can’t be real, so I jump from my bed confused and looking outside my window. As my eyes meet the passing clouds, slowly the feeling sinks. The emotions ache as they pass my heart. I wish it wasn’t like that.
Michael Daaboul
64 million people had chronic obstructive pulmonary disease worldwide in 2004. By 2030, it is estimated to be the fourth leading cause of death worldwide due to an increase of people smoking. 3 million people died of COPD in 2005.
Excerpt from Powerless By Michael Daaboul

The Psychologist, the Boyfriend and the Wandering Heart

Psychologist: What’s your greatest fear?
Boyfriend: Um, hmm… greatest fear. Spiders?
Psychologist: Well, yes, but what about in your life if something was taken away or if you lost your job, elements like that.
Boyfriend: Aah, I see what you mean. I think it would be my girlfriend. If she wakes up one day, looks at me and thinks I don’t want him by my side anymore. That she will fall out of love. That would be the hardest thing doc.
Psychologist: Why do you fear this?
Boyfriend: I don’t know, maybe because I love her so much and that one day it will probably happen. You know you hear about it, read articles about it that your relationship has like a 10 year lifespan. I don’t want to start again like that.
Psychologist: What are you doing about it?
Boyfriend: What do you mean?
Psychologist: If you fear it, what are you doing to reduce the likelihood of your girlfriend falling out of love?
Boyfriend: Nothing.
Psychologist: That’s the problem. Not you of course, but fearing something and letting fear overwhelm your existence. Why not do something about it?
Boyfriend: What should I do?
Psychologist: Continue being you. She fell in love with you. Don’t change who you are. Don’t show any less emotion than you did when you first met. Don’t stop doing all the things you love doing together. Remember when you first started to date? When you spent two hours in front of the mirror making sure your hair is right, trying to find the perfect place to go for weeks, researching on the internet. Maybe you were lurking on internet forums getting advice if you should get a gift or not. All those things, especially the part where you spent hours upon hours looking inside each other’s universes and talking about everything that makes your eyes light up. People fail in relationships because they forget who they are in a relationship. They’re so overwhelmed with fear and worry they miss the good parts. They fall into routine, forget about their partners emotionally, become boring, needy and desperate until one day, one of them wants out.
Boyfriend: Jesus, I didn’t think of it like that.
Psychologist: Most of the time, it’s the simplest answer that will get you there. It got you there at the start, why wouldn’t it meet you at the end?
I feel like you’re a lighthouse. I’m so far away from you, alone in the dark, but every now and then I see you glistering from a distance. Sometimes I blink and miss all the wonderful things you say. Wait for me, I know I seem like a galaxy away, but please, keep showing me the way.
Michael Daaboul

Making the Hard Decisions

Boyfriend: Making decisions that affect your life in a big way can be pretty daunting.
Girlfriend: I know right.
Boyfriend: What happens if I make the wrong one? You know, like, it’s a big thing.
Girlfriend: Just take time to think about it.
Boyfriend: Comes to a point where, you have to decide though. What if I can never go back to what I had before?
Girlfriend: That's why people are scared of change, afraid to go after their dreams. They realise they can't fly when they fall in real life. Maybe that's why I like sleeping. When shit happens in dreams, I can wake up, reset and call it a nightmare. I can go on and say it’s just a dream.
Boyfriend: What if I make the wrong decision; will you still be by my side?
When our song gets played on the radio or when the weather decides to be cold, I feel like dancing with you in the rain. I don’t care about what we do; I just hope our story never ends.
Michael Daaboul

Hello Darkness (Tribute to Robin Williams Special)

In this moment of darkness, I will not see the terror that’s unfolding around me. I have learned to close my eyes and curl into a ball. I hold myself tightly in the corner and I cry because I can’t take this anymore.

You can’t see me because I have turned off the lights. No one will be able to tell if I’m sick because I smile when they ask if I’m alright.

Where have I been? Where do I go? You may ask. I haven’t journeyed far from my room; I haven’t seen the world from the peak of Hanging Rock. I have been sitting in my room waiting for the light, a light that never came.

I know if I don’t speak, if I don’t seek help, no one will suspect a thing, and it will be my friend darkness and me, sitting in the corner where the cold air leaks and my maddening thoughts speak.

For when the morning comes, you will lose your best friend; you will lose someone you hold so deep. You will see me lying in the corner with a heavy heart and when you feel my unrhythmic pulse, you will be heartbroken. Everyone else that loves me will lose their hope, their will to live and I, will remain unspoken.

For all the joy and kindness I gave, I didn’t receive any for when I went the other way. When I sort out those who needed help and got them to pray, I made a deal with the Devil and sold my sanity on a midsummer’s day.

Tribute to Robin Williams who died on August 11, 2014.
- Michael Daaboul
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